There is no perfect relationship in this world. No matter how much you make an effort to reach a certain level of perfection in your marriage, you just could not do it. Imperfections are part of every relationship, and this is something you need to accept during the early stages of your union. One of the many challenges that may come your way is finding out that your partner needs to go through therapy.
At this point, it is necessary to emphasize the fact that therapy sessions can be stressful for your partner. Because of this, there is a high tendency that he would get irritated or annoyed in the beginning. However, the longer she undergoes therapy, the more she will recover quickly from depression or other negative emotions. As a spouse, the best thing that you need to do is to support him. Below are some of the ways on how you can show support:
- Stop Demanding Time
This is the point in your marriage where your partner needs to feel that he has control over how to spend his own time. Do not try to force him into spending time with you. Instead, give him a chance to attend the therapy sessions without thinking about your demands. Take note that as long as he is not well, both of you will never enjoy the quality time together. “Love is not about power and control. Everyone deserves a healthy relationship.” A reminder from Nicole Tammelleo, LCSW-R.
- Offer More Love
As already mentioned above, therapy sessions may be stressful at first. You cannot expect things to get better right away. There will be days when the other spouse is challenging to hang out with. You may see him crying or frustrated over petty things. Whenever this happens, all you have to do is to hug him and make him feel that you will always be by his side no matter what happens. This is the time of his life where he needs to receive more love from you. “Relationships in and of themselves do not create mental illness.” However, he adds, “When we suffer in our relationships, it can be difficult to move forward from past hurt and trauma.” Jor-El Caraballo, LMHC explains.
- Be A Good Listener
Let your husband feel that he can tell you anything he wants. Just listen to what he has to say and avoid making unnecessary judgments. If possible, do not interfere whenever he is sharing an experience or story. By simply knowing that he can trust you about his secrets is already therapeutic on his part. It can help him recover faster from an unfortunate event or happening.
- Never Complain
Therapy sessions may change some aspects of the marriage. Try to understand that these alterations and modifications are only temporary. As such, never let your partner know about all your complaints. The right thing to do is to become a bigger person in the relationship. Think about the future. Once the sessions are completed successfully, your marriage will be renewed. You will be surprised that the therapy has indeed changed your spouse into someone more loving, caring and affectionate.
The process of supporting your partner can be complicated. However, “You definitely can hang on to your unique self, trusting you do know yourself enough, while still leaving space for another person to be their own true selves.” Psychotherapist Sona DeLurgio, PsyD, LMFT said. Whenever you feel like giving up, just remember why you chose to be with him in the first place.